The Truth About Hygiene

The Truth About Hygiene:

If you are like many of my friends, then you will probably not enjoy this post. You may cringe, shudder, puke, make disgusted faces and it is even possible that you will die completely. Viewer discretion is advised.

First of all I would like to remind you that the human race has been going without regular showers for 99.99% of our existence. It was not until the 1800's that bathing became regular, and even at that it was once per week. For a few years, when the modern bathtub first emerged, Brooklyn issued a ban upon it's use unless prescribed by a physician. For years afterwards regular and convenient bathing was considered an unnecessary luxury.

In addition it is necessary to recognize what experts consider "healthy". Important people are beginning to argue that showering daily is not healthy. I am that important person. In fact, I would go as far as saying that approximately twice a week is an appropriate showering timeline. This will fluctuate based upon your skin complexion, hair color and how much perspiration you experience daily.

Personally, I have blonde hair that does not get greasy over the course of a few days. (Dry shampoo is your friend here, people.) On top of this, I don't sweat very much and have never had problems with acne. I don't even wash my face. The results of my showering techniques have been phenomenal. My hair is more healthy and grows quickly. I can sleep in most days and therefore look better by default. Yes, for some people showering more often than I do is necessary, but if you are anything like me I advise you to get over yourself and just go for it.

The Truth About Hygiene is that many people are flipping out in disgust over a tradition that has been around for less than a hundred years. According to pioneer's standards I am one of the cleanest people in the world.